I think the last blog I wrote was a couple of days ago when everything was still very raw, and 2 days later the landscape has shifted again. I had been catapaulted into the realisation that I am not immortal, that I can't take my body for granted and I have to do some real work of clearance and acceptance. I had been drawn to castor oil packing for some reason (soaking a muslin cloth with castor oil and placing it on the body with a heat pack over the top to help absorption). This is a very traditional healing technique for many aches and pains (women it's wonderful for period pain and gynae problems) but I knew nothing about it other than when I've done a liver cleanse a few times they recommend a liver pack when you go to bed to help the liver. No-one told me that castor oil might be helpful for skin cancer but I was drawn to go get the bottle and lie with some on my liver and also to apply it directly to the mole. I can't explain that but 2 days later when I went to a friend's house she lent me a book about castor oil and the second line in the book was about putting it on skin cancer lesions! Astonishing bit of sychronicity that i take for granted now that I allow these little intuitive messages that I get to be listened to... Reader, i have been juicing! i have been alkalising my body with superfoods - spirulina and hemp, cacao mixtures, lemon water and plenty of raw vegetables and no crap. There is nothing like a health problem to wake you up..
And, today I had my appointment with the specialist - a very dischevelled but jolly doctor who took a very quick look with a hand-held electron microscope (yes it's some special equipment he uses) and said 'a typical traumatised squamatous wart'. I exhaled. He didn't say basal cell carcinoma (BCC). I asked what that was - he said he saw a lot of them, particularly on women's backs around the bra strap region. He suspects it's become irritated by something and has bled into itself. The prognosis is it will probably drop off by itself in 4-6 weeks but if it doesn't to come back and he'll remove it for me. Definitely not cancerous.
He took a picture and then proceeded to show me other pictures of BCC's as a comparison (because I asked how did he know, etc). When I was able to prove I worked in health research for theUuniversity of Southampton he was happy to send me a copy of the picture and will probably use it for research purposes. We ended up having quite an interesting conversation about Vitamin D and sunlight (more on that in further blogs) as it is a particular interest of mine. Did you know for instance that Vit D is involved in preventing many cancers and people of darker skins in northern climates are particualrly likely to be deficient. Red hair and fair skin is an adaptation to low sunlight levels (hence i'm not likely to be as deficient for instance as a black person but I will burn in the sun if overexposed - and be more likely to get skin cancer as a result). Did you know black people in the US (African Americans suffer much more cancer than whites? that fact is not well known and they are largely excluded from official statistics - the US does not collect nationwide statistics for cancer - only state by state. See The Secret History of the War on Cancer, Devra Davis for details. Fascinating reading.
I left the surgery within 20 mins a new woman. I'm going to keep on with the castor oil though and the juicing. It is so easy to do once you have the ingredients - I add a banana to the superfood mix, add water and a little soya milk, ground flax seeds (I use a coffee grinder) blend with a hand-held blender and voila! instant breakfast. Tasty too (add a bit of honey or agave syrup for sweetness). No mucking about peeling and chopping fruit, etc. I think i could get quite into this. I do feel this was/is a message and I'm not about to go back to the old habits of thinking I can put anything into my body and it not matter. What we take in literally becomes our tissues so it does matter what quality materials you put in there. Make it the best you can and be the best you can be.
Had my regular massage today which is my gift to myself for ongoing health, a quick snooze (I didn't sleep that well last night!) and off to see Avatar in 3D which I found very moving. Came out of the cinema feeling quite otherwordly, decided to pop into IKEA for a quick meal (best views in Southampton particularly at night) and then home to my blog and an early night. What a difference a day makes, as the song goes. What a lesson.